Canucks Coffee: Firing blanks and sour moods

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During Tuesday night’s adventure I gave fans online a simple prompt:

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The Canucks are …

And we went from there.

Steve Burgess: … clinical evidence of masochism.

David: I think that’s the whole statement. It exists, but not much more than that

Andrew: Atrocious.

Anna Forsyth: the equivalent of someone thinking there are four dots in an ellipsis

Ian St. shared a clip of a cat trying to run up a slide

CVII: predictable. (and a clip of Capt. Holt saying “I am in incredible pain.”)

70charger: Time to sit Tocchet for a few games

Jacob: Dreadful

Sedinitronic: being on a Ryanair flight that was delayed for 45 minutes and then was turbulent the entire time.

Who? Me?: … remarkably going to cost more next year … by a lot.

Amélie Mel: unwatchable.

Petrishriekandgo: Tocchey … supposedly that’s how you ‘win championships’.

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Kent Basky: Putting my one remaining kidney at risk …

Nick: Erub, that is the reverse of the bure excitement days. If they sign tocchet to an extension I’ll be tempted to avoid games.

Raj: unwatchable, less stressful as well!!

Tim of the West: So, so very unentertaining

Guillaume Lefrançois: late 😭

Aaren T: Déjà vu

Smoke City FC: …..brutal.

YOSSARIAN.: 600 years behind the Chinese David Bidini’s quest took him to a rink on the seventh storey of a mall in Hong Kong — a rink encircled by a dragon-headed roller-coaster — and to the gritty city of Harbin in northern China, where a version of hockey has been played for 600 years;

Who? Me?: … lacking Canadian effort and grit.

Robert Alen Richter: Anemic.

Paul Warnett: Comfortably numbing

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Zach Abbott: Like the torture machine from Princess Bride.

Pops Paul: Uncoachable — at least currently, the players need to take ownership. (And a clip of Henry Winkler from The Replacements saying “visualize and attack”)

Kilroy: Why didn’t they move some of this malaise at the deadline? At least get some energy guys. Oof.

Chad GPT: A clip of Austin Powers trying to turn a golf cart in a very narrow tunnel.

CJ Harding: The Pete Campbell Not great, Bob! meme

Autopilot: Incredibly depressing

Aidan Moher: Oh, was there a game tonight?

Scott Beadle: Bunk

Dan Macholz: … sad

T L Nova: Painful

Hook Mglook: Is it bedtime yet?

jtiz9: Ugh …

the 3rd sno*man of the (event redacted): … nearly as frustrating as Leaf hockey.

 70charger: Pathetic.

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Stargazing wanderer: Not worth watching.

‪🇨🇦Kelownagurl‬:·frustrating.

craighenderson: Ugh

It’s a theme

What a difference a year makes. Last year during the thrilling playoffs, fans weren’t down. They weren’t morose.

They may have been slightly cynical, but that’s understandable: 55 years of pain and disappointment will do that to you.

You know who else is disappointed? The players. The look on their faces says it all.

They know they’re up against it.

“At this point of the season, there are really no moral victories,” young Victor Mancini said. “Obviously, it’s tough going down like that early, but we want to keep pushing forward. We know the game plan put in front of us. We want to stick to that and play hard and keep going at all times.”

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Dakota Joshua, who is very frustrated by his inability to finish: “We had some good looks, but just not good enough at the end of the day. And we got to find a way to make it happen.”

Puck luck

Since the J.T. Miller trade, the Canucks have scored just 1.5 goals per 60 minutes of even-strength ice time.

They’re a full goal off their expected goals rate: 2.6. Their 5.9 even-strength shooting percentage in the league is the NHL’s third-lowest.

So they are creating chances … but is that bad luck or bad finishing?

pjohnston@postmedia.com

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